Thursday’s Thoughts on Home: When there’s not enough…

As I’m typing this, a heating guy is here trying to get our heat working again.  We have radiant heat which I absolutely love, but it is original to the house 60 years ago.  We are 1 of 2 or 3 houses left on the block that hasn’t had to switch it over and I’m wondering if I’m going to get the bad news that it’s time…

Which if it’s time, it doesn’t just mean a new boiler, it means a whole new heating system: radiators, baseboards or ductwork.  Although it will be more efficient and if we go for the ductwork and heat pump that means central air too (bonus for this girl who can’t stand to be hot!), we’re talking about $12,000.  Which is about $11,950 more than we have.  ***I said this is a recent post about not having a lot of money – I truly don’t say it to ask for pity – it’s a decision we made – read it here.  But here’s my question / debate: how do you handle these things without accruing more debt?

I’ve been trying very hard not to use the credit card because we have old debt that we are still paying off.  The heating guy told me about a state program for a low-interest loan to take care of it, and that sounds great and is probably what we’ll have to do… but it still adds debt – and another payment which makes it even tougher to get through the months.    I wish I could say, well we can’t do it until we have the money… but we’re not talking about a vacation, we’re talking about heat.  Money was definitely much more fun when I was a teenager working at the local farm store and I spent my money on clothes and movies and things like that!

So since I’m sitting here starting to stress and worry, I know I need to talk to God.  I need to ask Him for wisdom and peace and trust in him.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Oh God, help me to trust you, because I know my own understanding just leads to stress and worry and anxiety…

Your father knows what you need before you ask him. So do not worry, saying ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ … your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Today’s trouble is enough for today. (Matthew 6:8b, 31-34)

Thank you God that you know all my needs and my family’s needs.  Thank you for providing for us.  Help me to wait on your provision instead of solving financial problems in a worldly way!

Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7)

God I do thank you for your love and the numerous ways you’ve proven your trustworthiness.  Thank you God that I have a home for my children.  I pray that it will be filled with warmth – and not just in temperature!  Lord, I ask for your peace as I learn to trust in you.

And I do feel better, but I’d love to admit that the perfect finish for this post would be to say that the heating guy just said it all looks good.  But he’s still working and I don’t know what he’ll say.  But with God, we’ll handle that when we need to!  Thanks for listening to me working through my stress.  I pray that you cannot at all relate to my struggles, but if you do, God’s words are for you, dear reader.   May you find comfort in them as well.

♥Becki

P.S. Jeff, if you are reading… you are an amazing provider.  I am so proud of how hard you work at your job to take care of your family and to help your students – students who wouldn’t be able to succeed in school without someone like you there.  (It’s not your fault that there’s not more money to pay teachers what they truly deserve.)  I’m also very proud of all that you do for God, your extended family, and your friends.  I would rather live snuggled up in a heatless home with you, then in a mansion without you.  I love you!

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